yipeeyipee-yaya

2009-12-05T23:04:00.000-08:00

BLOG SAYS:

I NO LONGER SERVE TO PLEASE THE CROWD.

CIAO, DARLINGS.

WILL BE BACK. SOON.

what they don't know

2009-11-08T07:33:00.001-08:00

I'M VERY BORED.

SOMEBODY ENTERTAIN ME.

the best damn thing

2009-10-31T20:13:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to get my life back on track. Desperately figuring out my goals, searching for answers.

I deleted many of my posts just now. I'm not sure why. I don't even know if I'm upset over it. I kind of want to keep them. But eventually, I did not let the attachment hold me back.

I'm getting anxious nowadays. For school to be over. For HCL to be over. For graduation ceremony to be over.

The best damn thing about this whole thing is that I can laze around at home and contemplate my own feelings. What do I want to do? Do I really want Hwachong? Do I even want to stay in Singapore? Why not just pack the bag and go somewhere else?

Like watery eggs and disgusting medicinal brew, the notion of junior college irks me. Terrifies me. It feels like I'm betraying the school for not wanting it. Not wanting HC. But I've no idea about anything else.

I wonder where everything will lead me to.

I love hot guys, gay or otherwise.

2009-09-28T22:56:00.000-07:00

I LOVE HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN. At least, for now.

picture from here

In times of need and creativity.

2009-09-03T04:37:00.000-07:00

I've just finished my progress report. Once again, I marvel at how wrong teachers can be sometimes. But nonetheless, it is quite heartening to know that most of them actually find me to be attentive, hard working, organized, blah blah blah, essentially, everything I'm not.

It's funny how 2 years ago, my form teacher (for whom we performed the teachers' day song to) commented that I am a "bubbly" and "happy-go-lucky" (of course, these are all loosely translated from Chinese. Actual meanings may differ, but rest assured they are all as "endearing") student WHO REFUSES TO HAND IN HOMEWORK ON TIME. Now, as can be seen from recent attitudinal improvements, I've been quite the model student (fine, maybe not) lately. Still, I can't grasp why teachers write what they write today and wrote what they wrote 2 years back. Did I really change for the better (or the proverbial turn OVER a new leaf), or am I just getting better and better at pretending to listen to class and jot down notes diligently, when I'm otherwise either busy daydreaming about a) Kyuhyun or b) kyuhyun in black tux or c) kyuhyun in black tux waiting down the aisle for me. You know, stuff like that.

AND I also can't help but wonder WHATEVER I DID TO DESERVE THAT FREAKING 7 FOR IH:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did I, sometime during the year, offend someone up there because I've always been so anti-Christ/Buddha/Whomever? Because I reiterate: I HAVE NOT. Or have I earned this colossal, massive, tremendous blow to my already shrinking ego because I yak too much about bitchy child sensations (RE: hello, New York~~~) and home-schooled actresses (RE: V-baby)?!

I refuse to drown in the dark pools of misery and fury any longer. I can't help that my essay-writing skill is soooooo poor, and that I am incapable of memorizing huge chunks of shticks only kukus can remember. I admit defeat and concede to the fact that I am but a normal and inconsequential addition to the amazing mother planet, and that normal and inconsequential beings like me are NOT actually designed to pass their IH (It's truly not in the genes, can't help I got the shorter end of the stick). Those who do will end up in the asylum 10 years down the road and mentally sound adults like yours truly will weep forever for their lost sanity...Fine. Whatever. I'll moved on. IH have permanently damaged my soul, but I move on.

I've wasted too much time lamenting and crying (not literally, of course) over whats-done-and-cannot-be-undone.

The day I finally conquered IH, lamp posts shall fall and fire walls will crash. Mark my words. Not.

On cue

2009-07-24T18:41:00.000-07:00

I went home yesterday feeling really, really awful. Due to a heavily impaired memory induced by a ginarmous headache, I shall not talk about the 852 trip. In short, the sucky ancient bus came and I got stuck on the shitty (oops, sorry for the expletive) old seats, which apparently was not really enough to fit 2 butts. Nevertheless, after 2 years of experience, I've sort of conceded to the fact that this is never going to change, and that the crappiness is actually part of 852's charm (by which I meant 852's amazingly torn and tattered smelly seats, and awesome air conditioners that drip water. Sooooo retro....).

Anyway, by the time I reached home, I was running a high fever, and was suffering from a splitting migraine. At this point of time, you would probably imagine that I was dearly comforted and consoled my my soft and gentle mother. But uh no. Unfortunately for me, my mother literally had a fit upon knowing my temperature, and I was cruelly scolded because apparently I-on-the-fan-while-sleeping-and-did-not-take-good-care-of-my-own-body. So tata, there was my fantabulous Friday afternoon.

Then my dad came home and I was suddenly deemed an H1N1 carrier.

At around 8, I went to TanTock Seng (ah, the place I went when I had a fra
ctured arm. Beauuuutiful memories.) Saw a ultra hot paramedic. But then again, I was kind of in confusion then. So I might have looked wrongly. Who knows, it might be some 50 something LKK -.- Due to prolonged coughing, I was forced to do an X-ray on my lungs despite my several attempts to tell the nurse that I-have-actually-had-one-just-3-months-ago. And anyway, I got this very gentle Filipino doctor who speaks very gently and had a very gentle look about him. So in the end I was told that I am not a H1N1 carrier after all, but actually had a very mild chest infection, hence the fever.

Therefore, I went home safe and happy and ate my antibiotics. Then, I went to sleep and did not on the fan again.

Obsessively so.

2009-07-09T03:58:00.000-07:00

Ever since a book I read in secondary 2, I've been kind of fascinated with fireworks. I used to fear that I might one day turn into some kind of a pyromaniac. Then I realize it will be impossible because I hate fire.

Which is really ironic because I loooove fireworks. I enjoy watching the reaction of lithium with water. Sort of sporadic and amazing and cataclysmic. An instant beauty, withheld in a second's eternity (Such nice words! By me!).

So my newest ambition is to start a designer fireworks brand.

I'll make fireworks the newest trend. The hottest fashion across the globe. Everybody will drink it up like martini. And I'll monopolize the entire fireworks industry, my brand an international icon. When everybody think of fireworks, it'll be my fantabulous fireworks company. Sort of like, Donna Karen to maternity wear and Vera Wang to wedding gowns.

We'll have fireworks shows from Milan to Vegas. And I'll have models to endorse my products (I'm thinking of Lily Cole 'cos she's hot and smart). And my customers will be snotty rich brats who are obsessed with setting wonderful colors to the sky. How cool is that? They will totally get addicted to it and they will no longer indulge in other forms of unhealthy addictions such as sex (I'm not sure about this one), drugs and pornographic cat fights.

Goodbye, my air stewardess dream!
Goodbye, my lab researcher dream!
Sayonara!

I must move on to a brave new world.

Scrap teacher

2009-07-08T02:14:00.000-07:00

I'm watching Scrap teacher. Truth be told, the only reason why I am watching is because there are a lot of pretty boys.

I used to love Japanese pretty boys.

Then ever since Super Junior and DBSK, I sort of strayed away.

However, it seems that I'm starting to like pretty Jappies all over again. Yes. Despite the fact that they are like, grotesquely thinner and shorter than I am, I'm still undeniably and irrevocably in love with their prettiness (note: NOT hotness!) I'm fanatic over their eyes, especially. Beautiful Jap guys have beautiful eyes! :DD

Oh and Japanese dramas are much, much shorter than the Korea ones. Korean dramas are like 20++ episodes per series! The Japanese ones only have about 15 each, and the episodes are stand-alone! Cool right :)

A weird kind of relationship.

2009-07-07T03:11:00.000-07:00

I'm facing some sort of a dilemma.

I'm confronted with the awful realization that if I don't do something soon, I'll claw my own guts out in frustration and paranoia. But then again, I doubt I really can do anything at all.

So you see, the beauty of my inner debate: I'm afraid of not doing anything. But I am also scared of doing something. I am now burdened with a sense of fear and hopelessness.

My only consolation now is I am not the only one. Sooner or later I'm going to derive a resolution. Solve everything, once and for all.

MAMA DO

2009-07-04T05:13:00.000-07:00

It is a super nice song. Oh, and look out for the slap at the end. Damn cool.

What would my mama do,
If she knew about me and you?
What would my daddy say,
if he saw me hurt this way?

BSP CAMP PHOTOS

2009-06-09T06:51:00.000-07:00

LOL. Benjamin was still at his WONDERSOCKS pose when he was receiving the prize -.-
Okay. The photos totally uplifted my mood :D Credits to: Shilun and Simone.

Carcinogen

2009-06-08T18:38:00.000-07:00

For some weird reason, the word "carcinogen" has been popping up in my mind for the past few days. And I have no idea why. I don't even know what it means D:

So I checked Wikipedia. Okay, it apparently refers to any substance that is "directly involved in the promotion of cancer". That sounds totally morbid please. I mean, why would I be thinking of something that helps propagate cancer -.-

Although it has yet been proven that I have been exposed to radiation or radionuclide, I think what is really carcinogenic in my life is the inhuman amount of homework I have. I'll have cancer a few years down the road because my teachers gave me too much homework during that fateful June holidays in 2009. Then when my hair starts dropping off, I will contemplate suing all of them. LOL. Hence, my conclusion is that to avoid all this drama, we should ban homework. And avoid cancer. Hooray :D

I am going to try and finish the portfolio later on. I AM NOT GOING TO DELAY ANY FURTHER. I am totally going to complete it by today. At least, I hope so. Then I can go and redo my biology SIA, which I have flunked. AND I have to do the 5 R&Rs. Actually, I have no idea why they insist that we do 10 R&Rs. Isn't it more than sufficient to do just 5? Come on, do they seriously think we are going to read EVERYTHING? 10 R&Rs is just too much for anybody to handle ):

I'm going to youtube if there's time. WHEE :DD

Screw physics

2009-06-07T06:29:00.001-07:00

My first mistake: Take up physics.

My second mistake: Continue with it.

In a hopeless attempt to salvage my marks and get me to appreciate physics, I was forced into accepting 2 brand new assessment books from my dad. Sadly, although my dad spent half his life pursuing physics , as his daughter, I have absolutely no inclination towards this particular spectrum (??) of science.

I can't even recall the Newton's 3 laws. And I take ages to connect a circuit. I get confused between a rheostat and a diode. I just suck at physics. Period. Good thing I'm not taking 'O's, or I'll get a D7 or something. And yeah, I'm definitely dropping it in JC. If not, someone can check me into the asylum.

I'm dying D: I regret ever thinking I can handle what I can't (RE: physics). If I've known better, I would have chosen geography or something instead. At least I don't have to wonder why I am the only person not faring well in the subject. Plusplus I don't have to do stupid practicals like counting the pendulum swings or measuring the focal length (roll eyes).

And I really, really need to start work on my portfolio. Gee. Life is a class A bitch O:

BSP camp

2009-05-11T03:41:00.001-07:00

Too fcuking busy, and vice versa.
- Dorothy Parker, reply to her editor who was asking for her belated work while she was on her honeymoon

So I am going to be a facilitator after all for the camp. After all the hassle, I still cannot escape my grim and forbidding fate. OK. That sounds totally dumb. I always know that I am going to become a facilitator. I thought that was the only thing I could be. So I was more or less resigned to...destiny. Or karma. Whatever. Point is, I grew to be accustomed to the idea of being a facilitator. So I was more or less used to the bleakness of my future DD:

Then came along the meeting, and POOF! I thought my future would change. You know, take a turn for the better. So I could escape being a group leader and become a EXCO. Not that I really liked being one. I just thought it would be better than shouting cheers and calling out useless commands and watching my juniors passing straws with their mouths. Which, I have to reiterate, I do NOT enjoy watching. I know some people, like TJW (ahem) may well enjoy this sort of scene. And I do admit, I find it extremely gratifying to watch people being tortured and mangled and whatever.

BUT I am not so sick as to find satisfaction in witnessing some sort of weird straw-passing game that reminds me of mating rituals of the past. Okay. So I do. But you see, unlike TJW (ahem again), I can find much better things to do to find that sort of contentment. Say, eating Tom Yam at Thai Express (which I did on Sunday. The food was soooo delicious)

Plus I did partake in the game once. So I sort of understand how...ridiculous the whole game is -.-

But I digress.

I just don't like being a facilitator. 'Tis all. Interaction with strangers. Gee. No thanks. Pass the coke please. I'm all for free love. But getting all enthu and sweaty and cheerful within 3 seconds of introduction? Sorry, outta here babe :D

And OMG. The funeral downstairs just started its customary racket. The last time somebody died, the whole extended family and the priests chanted for 3 nights straight. And don't get me started on the whole funeral procession. I was so awed (yes, NO sarcasm intended) by the grandeur I choked on my rice while watching it go by :DD

My only consolation now is that WY and a lot others are suffering along with me. Or they might not think it to be suffering actually. Maybe I'm the only one who thinks so DD: Hm. I'm not at all reluctant to go to the camp you know. Just very blahblah with the facilitator idea.

Anyway I have not studied a single bit this long weekend. Right now, I am filled with remorse and regret, and feel a strong urge to clobber my own head because I do not have the sense to revise for the retarded spa skill 3 on Friday. I pray to god that it would be titration or something easy. If not, I'm going to kill myself O:

With Sodium Carbonate or something. Haha. I'm so funny -.-

My exposition essay is looking dead. Till late.

DAYS

2009-04-23T02:18:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUNA!!

Hope you enjoy your sweet 16th ((:

It is nice to be young. Let us treasure our youth! AZA FIGHTING!

Okay. The sudden outburst was pretty lame. Trying to create an atmosphere there. I just replaced my old skin, because I thought this one is cuter. I hate milk actually, but that's besides the point. The vibrant colors will chase away the blues :D Plus anyway, the cookie look delish. Haha.

We are changing seats. As much as I liked sitting with Cheryl and gang, I guess this is inevitable. Maybe it will be the best for everyone. At least, everyone gets a change, right? And hopefully, it would be a change for the better for some. I think I am pretty fine with whomever I am assigned to sit with (that means TC & Mel). Make new friends. Learn new things. I can't be stuck in the same circle anyhow. And anyway I must learn to step out of my comfort zone.

That is actually the reason I've signed up for MP attachments. Usually, I would hate this sort of thing. But maybe if I don't grab this opportunity now, I might lose it forever. And it is not like I have much to do anyway. I might as well make something out of my time.

Oh, and there is this VXXX thing tomorrow with Mr. JT and god-knows-who. I hate interviews. The BSP interview has left me scarred forever. I tend to stumble and stutter in front of those I am not acquainted with. Even if there were lots of smiles and laughter and jokes and whatever, I will still feel really, really uncomfortable. And it is NOT a nice experience. I giggle when I'm nervous.

I giggled all the way through my BSP interview.

Maybe I'll just screw up and embarrass the school. LOL.

But anyway, that aside, I still have CCA tomorrow. I must remember to collect squash fund. AHEM Many people have not paid me yet! I am mighty upset about it. Tomorrow, I am going to hunt people down and make them PAY. No choice. Everyday I pass by the squash board and feel kind of guilty for slacking off my job.

I hate my conscience sometimes. Sigh.

BTW, I discovered that I really, really like cook books. Really, I do. I must be some kind of freak. Reading cook books actually give me an odd sense of satisfaction. Mentally I mean. My stomach still grumbles because I am perpetually hungry.

These are the types of books I like best:

Cook books <333>
Supernatural teen fictions. I do not mean Twilight here. I know tons of vampire series that are of way better quality please. As much as I enjoyed Twilight, please do not insult my taste and reading capacity.
Mystery teen fictions. OMG!! These are the best. I SWEAR.
Chicken Soups. I love these. They are really, really moving.
My sister's keeper. It is super duper uber awesome. So it is a whole category by itself :D
American SEVENTEEN/COSMOGIRL. I don't really like the make-up sessions, because I find them pretty redundant. But the articles sometimes are pretty good. And realistic for teens. If you love pretty teen models and BODYPEACE articles and crazy real life dramas, then check them out (:

I a perspiring like a bucket now (okay, weird expression or words) WHY IS THE WEATHER SO FREAKING HUMID NOWADAYS?! I must start saving papers soon and plant trees in my backyard. I NEED COOL AIR!

And I just realized how much Miss. LI has done for the class. If I were her, I might have already given up on the class. I wonder which sane being can deal with all the drama. Seriously, Miss. Li, I 服了 u. You are the first teacher whom I really look up to. You are my idol forever!

Okay. This must be the longest post I've ever wrote. I'm pretty hungry. I shall go raid the fridge.

Till later.

PHYSICS SPA.

2009-04-22T18:29:00.000-07:00

A day after Physics SPA, and I am still mourning for the loss of that 1 mark. I am suffering from post traumatic experience right now )): Contrary to popular belief, 1 mark is ALOT. Especially since the entire SPA is only worth 4. I am pretty depressed now.

Good thing is, I did quite well for my biology quiz. Hooray. Score one for me.

Life has been very tiring lately. I am weighed down by tons of homework. However, I have finished some of them already, so I am not very worried about them now. I am just very frustrated with the SIAs. I shall not speak more of this matter. Or I might snap.

And I pray fervently that Ji Lao Shi won't be giving back our Chinese papers at anytime soon. PRAYPRAYPRAY.

BTW, I suggest that some people take Prozac. Seriously, you need it.